The Crummy Mummy

Last weekend C and I went to see the third installment of the Mummy trilogy, which really should've remained one movie, seeing as the first one was the only really good one. This one was so blah that I don't even remember the movie's subtitle (something about a tomb I think?). It was okay and somewhat cool to see on the big screen, but I would rather have waited for it to come out on DVD then spend $13. Oh yes, we paid that much because the showing we went to was in the "Director's Hall," which meant we got to reserve our leather-clad seats before going into the theater. And that was it. Three extra bucks for that, and it's not even like the theater was that crowded! And leather seats? Whoop-de-doo. Now if there was a massage mechanism... :)
Anyway, you go into the movie thinking that with a bad guy like Jet Li, you're gonna get some bad-ass kung fu fight scenes. Unfortunately, that feeling changes to disappointment as you walk out of the theater because there really aren't any. There's a short one in the beginning with an assassin, then there's a sword fight with him and Michelle Yeoh where you wish they had done their own choreography rather than follow the bland moves given to them. And of course, there's the final battle between Li and Brendan Fraser, lead man, where you wonder how, after getting his ass beat by some crazy kung fu moves, the white guy suddenly overpowers the martial arts master with something as simple as a couple of head butts.
Even the characters were fairly weak, especially the main ones which is never good for a movie. Rachel Weisz doesn't even come back as the wife for this one, and the new chick just doesn't hold her own, as herself or as part of the O'Connell team. Their son, Alex, is a cocky S.O.B. who's only enjoyable half the time. And even Fraser is given these paltry lines that make him look more like a schmuck than an experienced hero and slayer of mummies. The only guy who completely fell back into the usual routine is the guy who plays the brother (whose name I can never remember). He still has the funny one-liners and is constantly startled by anything and everything, making him the most fun character in the movie.
At least the storyline was different from the other two, bringing us to a different land with a new mummy. I just wish there was a better script (this one was more cutesy than anything else) and more colorful action scenes. Normally for action movies I feel like the fights drag on too long, but for this movie I wish they had given us more, quantity and quality.
The first movie will always remain the best one, simply because it is funny, charming, and action-packed. The second one C and I couldn't even remember that well, so I'm assuming we weren't that impressed by it!
And hopefully, with this movie out of the way, they will put the mummy series back in its rightful place- buried.